About This is Not a Grift
This newsletter provides 100% legitimate and trustworthy investment1, health, and life advice guaranteed to make you feel richer, livelier, and smarter.
Why subscribe?
Look, good question. Finding Science Fact-based Health Tips and getting the insider knowledge from the Stock Market Businesses Men and Health Doctors takes time. Sitting through lengthy webinars and swaping fax messages with some of the world’s Richest Human People takes even longer. But in order to get the most truthfully adjacent information at the fastest speeds straight to your inbox and into your very Smart Brain (which is behind a very Handsome Face, I must say) makes it all worth it so you can feel richer, livelier, and smarter.
Each [set period of time] — free of charge at no expense to you whatsoever —you’ll recieve one newsletter which will contain the following:
Hottest Health Hints: this section follows the latest health trends to keep you feeling in fine fettle.
Money Making Mantra: this section will point you in a direction when it comes to where you may want to spend your hard earned cash to make it feel like you might one day possibly make a return2. Maybe.
Barry’s Bum Steer: There’s this guy, Barry, who is always down at my bookie’s who gives the best life advice on anything you can think of. Most of the time you don’t even have to ask, he just tells ya! It’s gold.
Join the Exclusive Club
On top of this, if you choose to subscribe and pay money for this Essential Life Changing and Importantly Good newsletter you’ll join the very exclusive and totally only Very Smart People Allowed mailing list who will recieive Bonus Content which will include even more Personal Hygiene Tips, Ideas for How to Best Use The Money You Find Down the Back of the Couch, and much much more.
So you’ll be getting exclusive newsletters with hot-off-the-press news plus two other pieces of content all for the reasonable price of $5 a month.
Spread the word, get a discount
If you bring in just three more paid subscriptions into the This is Not a Grift fold and spread the word so even more people can feel richer, livelier, and smarter you’ll recieve a special Founders Membership. This even more privileged enrollment for Genius Level Super Models drops the price of yearly memberships.
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Please note: all “advice” provided in this newsletter is not intended to actually be followed.
Please note: all “advice” provided in this newsletter is not intended to actually be followed.
